The choice to travel : dealing with people reactions
You have already consult yourself whether you should leave for travel or not ! You finally got to take the big step : long term travel ! Usually for 3 months length to unlimited term ! Whether you want to do a world trip, travel a continent, to expat in a country … all possibilities are infinite ! You are excited and scared at the same time … since you have to announce it to your close ones ! Parents, siblings, uncles/aunts, cousins, grandpa/grandma, friends or even coworkers … the list is long !!! You are guessing all their reactions because you know them. Between the one who will support you, the one who doesn’t get it, the one who doesn’t care … you have to be mentally strong !
This is not a easy path and yet, you need to get it through to go to the next step. Here are some advises to best pass this moment … that can become your worst one !
SET A D-DAY
You decided to leave ! Very well ! But when ? Easy to say but in order to make it real, you need to set a date. It will makes you visualize the remaining time to best plan you departure in every way : from administrative to personal life.
Yes, shield yourself ! Because you will face people who will second guess, blame or even diminish yourself ! And if you want to make it happen, nothing has to come in your way ! Reconsider a decision is very easy and as simple as snap your fingers. That’s why you have to be psychologically strong so negative minds and words will not affect your judgment !
First with yourself ! As for me, I talk a lot with myself to encourage and boost myself ! Then you can find some articles or others’ feedbacks on similar situations. Read them, soak them to be strong !
ANNOUNCE TO THE CLOSE ONES
I mean by that parents and siblings. The first level to get through which can usually be a failure. Worry family might get you reconsider your decision.
SPREAD THE NEWS TO YOUR ENTOURAGE
We keep up on announcing the (good) news to coworkers, best friend, friends, cousin, uncle, others …
We are guessing all scenarios possible fearing some ones sometimes. And I figure that the reaction is not often the one we expected… and both way. Between the person who has a good reaction while we expected the world to fall apart and on the opposite, when we thought it would go right and finally total misunderstanding !
If I have an advise to give, start with the ones who might be the most comprehensive and supportive, the ones with positive energy ! You will gain confidence and more up to face the others with negative energy ! You will be stronger to face that kind of reaction.
Oooooooooh … the reactions ! To be honest, you will experience a rollercoaster of emotions ! There was reactions I didn’t expect. And you will have to deal with your own ones before planning your departure ! Between all announces to make, all put together, it took me a whole week !
So what kind of reactions who can face ?
THE ONE WHO DOESN’T UNDERSTAND
This person will demonstrate by A+B that what you are doing is bad, completely insane ! Often because this person never know that kind of experience. Sometimes, they say, it is because he/she is worry about you. Clearly when you get all the sh*t in your face, you don’t care if he/she is worry or not … you just think “come on !! why can’t you just respect my decision ?”
You will have to be strong to take all the talking because it can make you question your project ! Be sure and confident so nothing can alter your decision !
THE ONE WHO DOESN’T CARE
It is a surprising reaction which can be disturbing to deal ! Typically, this person uses this technique to protect him/herself of his/her own emotions. We all did it at one time, and to end crying in our own bed !! This person needs a little bit of time to realize the news and prepare psychologically him/herself of what’s coming next.
Leave this one deal the thing and come back to you when he/she gets it.
THE ONE COMPLETELY IN DENIAL
An other protective technique which consist about not accepting the truth ! This person will hope that you will reconsider your decision and wish not to think about the only final possibility : you will leave ! Usually, you won’t be able to talk about this project with him/her because he/she avoids it.
Well… Let it be.
THE ONE IN TOTAL CHOC
This is the reaction I didn’t expect, and yet, so obvious ! I felt like I announce death coming. This person will be completely closed, silent, without expressing anything … It is really hard to manage because we feel like we hurt this person and we feel guilty. We don’t know what to do nor say to improve the situation. And frankly, there is nothing you can do, just wait.
The best thing to do is to leave this person deal with it, tears can drop anytime.
THE ONE WHO SUPPORTS YOU
To be honest, you will find few people only in that category. There, said !
THE ONE WHO IS MORE EXCITED THAN YOU
Unlike previous reactions, there is still some that are truly happy for you. So happy that we feel like they are the one who is going to go !! It is very funny to experience. And weirdly, you are in the opposite situation where you need to mange this person’s energy !
Last, but not least …
Try not to announce this departure too late so everyone can deal with the fact that you will no longer be there for a while. As for me, I announced it 3 months before leaving (after months and months of thinking, I am talking about that here). Despite the fact that I often travel solo, it is more the long-term travel that surprised people. And mostly because I never talk too much about ongoing projects, I couldn’t say much about it before being sure of this.
And you ? What was the reactions of your close ones ? Share them with me 🙂
See you soon,